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I accept that some people genuinely may not know their plans until very late in the day – their work may entail short-notice travel or they could have responsibilities such as caring for a relative or child – but when someone says they “hope” to be there you can’t help concluding that they are hanging on in case something better comes along.

Why people think it is OK to completely ignore a party RSVP these days is beyond me.

It made me feel I was expected to sell the party to him, if I were to be graced with his presence.

Others among the 18 responded with a “maybe”, an equally maddening reply.

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As hosts, we were prepared to spend a great deal of time, effort, energy and money making sure we people would enjoy themselves.

In December, my partner Sonja and I held a Christmas party at our London home.

After weeks of planning, what struck us as the most challenging aspect of the whole event was not how much to spend on wine, what music to play or whom to invite from the minefield of people who were not on speaking terms, but how difficult it was to simply get people to let us know whether they wanted to come or not.

All my guests had to do in return was rattle off a quick “I’d love to come” or a “thanks, but no thanks”.

Being British, that was all we required – unlike in Los Angeles, where you can imagine why a typical RSVP, which comes complete with enough questions about dietary requirements as the average GCSE, might put people off.

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